Is Infertility Killing Your Sex Life? Get Intimacy Back with Dr. Nichole McNichols

Written By Lora Shahine, MD

Has trying to conceive turned sex from something fun and spontaneous into another task on your fertility checklist? Are ovulation tracking, timed intercourse, and fertility treatments putting a strain on your relationship? How can you rebuild intimacy and sexual desire when infertility has taken the joy out of your sex life?

In this episode of Brave & Curious, Dr. Lora Shahine welcomes Dr. Nicole McNichols, human sexuality expert, University of Washington professor, and author of You Could Be Having Better Sex, for an honest conversation about how infertility impacts sexual intimacy and relationships. 

Together, they explore why the pressure to conceive can decrease sexual desire, create tension between partners, and turn physical connection into a clinical process. From the emotional toll of negative pregnancy tests and IVF treatments to the challenges of timed intercourse, they discuss why maintaining intimacy while trying to get pregnant can feel so difficult.

Dr. McNichols shares tips for reducing performance pressure, prioritizing nonsexual physical affection, and creating opportunities for intimacy outside the fertile window. They also discuss sexual dysfunction, painful intercourse, and when to seek support from a sex therapist or couples counselor. 

This episode offers compassionate, actionable advice to help you strengthen your relationship while trying to conceive.

In this episode you’ll hear:

[2:29] How Infertility Impacts Sexual Desire

[9:02] The Emotional Toll of Trying to Conceive

[16:15] Sharing the Fertility Journey

[20:56] Timed Intercourse and Performance Pressure

[26:06] Infertility, Self-Blame, and Body Image

[28:50] Rebuilding Sexual Intimacy

[32:26] Sexual Dysfunction and Fertility

[41:26] Painful Intercourse and Treatment Options

[48:51] Strengthening Relationships During Infertility

Resources mentioned: 

www.nicolethesexprofessor.com

@nicole_thesexprofessor on Instagram

@nicole_thesexprofessor on TikTok

@nicole-mcnichols on LinkedIn

Dr. Shahine’s Weekly Newsletter on Fertility News and Recommendations

Follow @drlorashahine Instagram | YouTube | Tiktok | Her Books

Join the Learn at Pinnacle app to earn FREE CE Credit for listening to this episode!4

This episode was produced by Audiotocracy Podcast Production.

Lora Shahine, MD

Dr. Lora Shahine, reproductive endocrinologist at Pacific NW Fertility and Clinical Assistant Professor at the University of Washington in Seattle, completed her residency in OBGYN at the University of California in San Francisco and fellowship in reproductive endocrinology at Stanford University. She is dedicated to educating and advocating for increased awareness of infertility, miscarriage, and the impact on environmental toxins on health through an active social media presence, teaching, clinical research, and authoring multiple blogs and books including best selling, ‘Not Broken: An Approachable Guide to Miscarriage and Recurrent Pregnancy Loss.’

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